Going Home

Sometimes when your life gets chaotic you just need to go home and hang out with your mom.

This weekend I went to go visit my mom, friends and family in the high desert. It been a year since I have gone home and it seems like a lot changed. There are new restaurant’s, grocery stores and schools that they recently built.

I wanted my trip home to be relaxing so I only planned to see my family. It has felt like years since I last seen them. So it was so nice catching up with them and having those moments when we are dying of laughter.

I also got to catch up with one of my old friends from middle school. She is one of the few friends that I decided to keep in contact with. The crazy part of it all is that we picked up right where we left off. We talked about what is going on with our lives and I caught her up with what our friends are up to now. My favorite part of our whole conversation was the old photos she brought of us. She showed me a photobooth photo strip that we had taken a long time ago.

I saw a photo of a young girl who was confident, happy and not afraid to be herself. As years went by that person was hidden away. The opinions of others made me want to reel that personality in. So I became quiet, shy and invisible so I would never stand out again. It that same reason why I hate people staring or looking at me.

After the weekend was over I was sad to leave. My home city is relaxed and so chill that time feels like its going by slow. When I’m in the living room watching my mom shows with her, my sister and our cats; it feels like I have never left. Saying goodbye to everyone was hard especially because I don’t know the next time I will see them. So I made two important goals that I want to work on and that is keeping contact with my family better. The second one is bring that person I hid away from people back. I want to radiate the confidence, happiness and personality my 12 year old self shared willingly with others. It won’t be easy and there will be a lot of walls that need to get knocked down in order for that to happen. But I’m willing to put in all the time and energy into it.


Feeling Home Sick…

Ever since my sister and I were a babies we had a babysitter. My mom worked full time and my dad was a truck driver so no one could really stay home with us. My babysitter who is more like a grandma to me would take care of us at her home.

We used her address to go to the school closer to her home. It was because of her that I not only had an amazing childhood but irreplaceable memories. Her daughters and son became apart of my family.

When Halloween slowly creeps up I begin to get home sick. I start missing the old times where we would come home from school and watch Goosebumps. I miss her daughter doing my make-up before going out to go trick o treating.

Since I don’t live at home I rarely see my mom and sister. So I miss our living room discussions and our laughing attacks. Most importantly I miss my O.G. little baby (my cat).

Life in Hesperia is so chill and relaxing. After a weekend spent there its so refreshing that it makes going back to Torrance so hard. Especially when my mom makes her delicious breakfast. I automatically get up to the smell of bacon, something that rarely ever happens at my home.

I’m looking forward to going home and seeing everyone soon.